Self Discovery

by: Heather Dawson

The turbulent storm was raging outside, just as it had been almost all day. The humidity and the pounding of the rain were making me sleepy and tired. Just plain old groggy. I decided to retire to my bedroom for a nap until the showers had ended. I was too weary to continue working on the business project that was before me. I had, for sometime, been in a self evaluation period, and I no longer felt like I knew who I was. Somewhere something had gotten lost.

I retreated to my bedroom as the thunder roared. It was illuminated only by the misty haze that hung in the spring air. I slipped out of my sweats and went across the room to toss them into the hamper. I began to re-trace my steps, as I caught my image in my mirror. I stopped, looking curiously for a moment. The hazy light made my fair skin seem luxurious. My blonde hair, pulled up, had taken on an ash tone, and my oval face was highlighted by my full blush lips and deep grey eyes.

I raised my hand to my face and traced the soft lines of my cheekbones, my eyes closed as I began caressing my flesh. I looked down at my breasts, through the mirror, full and round, they stood suspended by the bra that held them. I moved my hands to release them from the contraption that embodied them. My nipples became erect and took on a sudden glow.

I began to feel my sexuality as the sweet fragrance of my own flesh rose and hung in the heavy air. As I closed my eyes, I saw my delicate body and envisioned it wrapped lightly in silk. I placed the palms of my hands on my nipples, and began circular motions as I felt the imaginary fabric caressing them to their full alertness. I gazed again into the mirror, as I guided a hand to my panties, I felt the texture of the satin ribbon daintily tied in bows against my hips.

I tugged gently at the ribbon until the bow came untied, the corner of the panty fell down exposing the skin just to the side of my vagina. My stare into the mirror had become fixed as I stroked the skin with my littlest finger. I watched myself convince my other hand to render the other bow unsecured, allowing the light panties to dropped to the floor beneath me.

I looked down to see the wisps of golden hair that was no longer compressed by the panties. I watched in the mirror as I guided my fingers, gently placing them over my vagina, the warmth comforted me as my forefinger slipped down to where my vaginal lips began to part. I felt the moistness that I had anticipated, the heady sensations that arose intoxicated me, and my legs began to quiver with bliss.

I spread my legs slightly apart as I began to massage my clitoris, pressing it between my fore and middle fingers. The motion increased my secretions much to my pleasure, and I began to press delicately, nurturing it until I felt it begin to swell.

I saw myself as a glorious vision of loveliness as I began my decent to the carpet. Now on my hands and knees, I turned sideways seeing my breasts hang down, greeting their new environment with utter elegance and grace. I raised my feet above my buttocks, supported only by my hands and knees. I lowered my bosom enabling me to massage them on the soft, yet scruffy carpet.

I began to move slowly back and forth as I watched my nipples graze the textile. It was a wondrous sensation as I again felt them become fully erect. I felt a drop of my essence roll down my inner thigh. I raised to face my mirrored image, relishing my sexual glory, I sat with my legs spread apart, resting my buttocks on the heels of my feet.

I watched enthralled as I raised hands to my breasts, again with my thumb and fore-finger, I rolled the nipples, they tingled with extraordinary pleasure. I pulled them outward and increased the applied pressure, I raised them upward and exposed the ivory skin beneath. I pulled and tugged at them until I could stand no more. I placed both hands onto them and began to squeeze and massage all of their area.

I watched myself as I was doing this and revelled in the release of my stress. I felt a sense of security knowing that I could be in control of at least on thing in my life…the way I made love to myself. My sensations and confidence allowed me to become totally uninhibited, exploring my body and my total sexuality.

I abandoned my thoughts and moved my hands down to my vagina, curiously watching the mirror to see what I would do next. I glided a finger to the opening of my tunnel and felt my warm juices oozing. I slid my finger inside me and began to explore the inner walls of my pleasure center. I entered another finger and watched myself glide them in and out, in and out.

I began to grind rhythmically against my fingers, I pumped them harder and faster as I began to moan in a low whisper. My essence was flowing freely so my fingers glided easily, I watched my image in the mirror and began to increase my trusts. I pushed harder against my hand as I watched my lips spread and contract. I used my other hand to steadily massage my clitoris, only to increase my stimulation tenfold. I felt and watched as my body began to involuntarily convulse, the ritual that would bring me full climax.

I pulled my fingers out of my vagina and rubbed the thick juices over my entire vaginal area, then I re-inserted them. I spread my lips with my other hand and caressed them gently, rubbing the juices into them. I watched my fingers slide in and out of my vagina in the mirror. I watched my mouth open and my tongue spread fiery saliva across my lips.

My pace quickened, and my long, hard thrusts turned to short, violent ones. I flicked a finger quickly on my clitoris as the others pumped me faster. My head fell back, I let out deep sighs of pleasure . . . I knew that I was there.

My whole body began to contract and my movements were tense. Sensations rippled through my body in immense waves as I plunged my fingers deep into my vagina and massaged my clitoris with extreme pressure. My juices gushed onto my fingers and hands in colossal volume. I continued gliding my fingers in and out, steadily decreasing speed and force. I felt total release as if all was drained from within me, my body contracted once more dropping me to the floor.

I turned on my side and placed my head upon the carpet, I turned to query the mirror with one final gaze. I again saw myself as glorious. I had never experienced anything like this before, nor had I ever dreamed of anything similar. I had felt my total womanhood . . . more importantly, I had seen her.

I raised and crossed the hazy room once more. I pulled back the covers and slid into bed and fell into a deep slumber.

The storm had ended…inside and out.